journal entry #5

Just great. Why do I keep forgetting the date today? Okay, maybe not just today, but recently, as well. Signs of aging, perhaps? I'm turning 28, anyway. Not only that, the right side of my nose slightly hurt for some reason and I have to figure out why.

Anyway, I didn't do much today other than the usual. Should I list the ones that are different?

Here they are. I think it's better this way.

• I paid for this month's electric bill, so yes. I ended up going out of the house.
• After paying the bill, I went to various stalls in Maharlika and Center Mall to find cardigans. Long cardigans, to be exact. I was able to buy two for ₱80.00 each.
• This actually happened around midnight. I was still awake at the time. I ended up changing my IG username from fjad830 to florencejoycead830 after blocking someone. I haven't done that (the blocking part) in months. I don't mind being friendly on IG but seriously, don't make me do things I don't want to. And don't say things easily like you're assuming that you're the person I'm going to choose to be with. I'm truly scared with that kind of approach and it makes me really uncomfortable. So sorry if it came out mean. But the one thing I hate is assuming that you're the guy for me. Assuming things had given me too much trauma since 6th grade.
• Aside from changing my IG username, I also changed my profile picture. I did a few more changes on the pictures I chose — from rain, an original character I drew a long time ago, to a song lyric from one of EXO's songs — before settling to a picture of a light teddy bear reading a book on a table. The teddy bear is something I really want right now, if I have to be honest. Haha!

So there you go. Not much, but at least there's something different. And as I recall it now, I forgot to add one more thing. I remember watching something on Youtube a long time ago, about certain signs that one's soulmate is coming near. One of the signs I remembered was about unconsciously doing things to make yourself beautiful — make-ups, beauty tips, things like that. I actually started becoming quite conscious about how I look just this year. There had been certain changes about the way I want to present myself whenever I go out and head to town recently that made me feel weird sometimes. But I'm still doing it.

Then also, the amount of selfies/selcas I've been taking this year. If I were to base it on my usual number of selfies taken in a week, the ones I had since the start of this year jad tripled. Seriously speaking...

Now I want to ask this question as I end writing today's entry here: What is going on with me right now?

Anyway, good night! (⁠•⁠‿⁠•⁠)